Monday, March 22, 2010

I'm really concerned about my father and could really use some advice

I was talking to my mom earlier today, she was with my father at the rehab centre today. I didn't like what I heard and I have to say I'm a bit worried for him. I was worried any way because the last time I saw him he looked really sad. Not just in sad shape but sad emotionally. Yeah, in the past years since he stopped working he hasn't been the greatest husband to my mother and I haven't gotten along all that well with him since I was an older teenager, but he is still my father. He wasn't always like he has been and he hasn't done anything bad enough to deserve this. I still care about him. He was a good father.

He's not getting proper care. They are supposed to be in his room to check on him every 2 hours. My mother was there several hours today and someone was only there to bring him lunch. They have him in a Depends because of his bladder control problem. Well that and the fact that he can't get out of the bed on his own. It went unchanged and unchecked until my mother said something to the charge nurse and regrettably that was after he had a bowel movement in it. According to my mother, when they changed it, it was saturated. Now I know you can't leave a baby in a dirty or wet diaper, so it makes sense to me that the same goes for a 73 year old man in a Depends.

There's another thing. We are nearly positive he's being drugged in some way. I know my dad. He's been my dad for all my 33 years. My mother is telling me he's scared of the staff there. Now I do understand that realizing one's own mortality may does things to a person, but this just isn't him. He was a biker. He raced cars. He raced motorcycles. He raced boats. I wouldn't have put it past him to race planes if he had the money and pilot's licence. Same goes for anything else that could be made to go faster. In his younger days he was a bouncer at a bar. He was forced to drop out of high school because of the number of fights he found himself in then. He was always a tough, stubborn and fearless man. If personality traits are genetic, it's certainly where the tougher side of me comes from. I remember rather vividly at my high school graduation someone making a remark about where he parked his customised '56 T-bird. My dad was right in that guy's face. Trust me when I say this, hearing about him fearing anyone is a huge shock. Even in his rather disabled state, it would be more likely to hear about him beating the stuffing out of a staff member rather than fearing them.

I'm going to pay the rehab a visit. I do need some advice first. Especially if any of this continues. As much as I'd like to walk in there and crack a few skulls, I have a feeling that's probly not the best course of action. Has anyone ever had to deal with this sort of thing?

I just want him to get well and be mobile again.

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